New 'Do

I finally decided to chop all the straggly long hairs I have been holding on to since losing practically all my hair during biochemo. My hair has started growing pretty fast so the new hairs started to take over and make the longer hairs seem like a Trump combover. Not a fan. So I cut it all the same length and to my surprise I actually really like how it looks! I know there will be a lot of awkward lengths ahead, but I'm interested to see how they all look, and what ones I will like! Here's to #shorthairdontcare!!

Slowly inching back into reality

This past week I started to inch back into reality of going back to work. I have started to feel better and my energy is coming back after 2+ months since chemo. It is amazing how much it takes out of you. I have been fortunate enough to have the means to not work during this time and focus my energy on getting better and just relaxing. I have a great family and many caring friends as well as a great boss who is probably overly protective of me and will only let me slowly start back at work for short periods of time. (which is really nice of her!)

I helped man the Urban Farm and Feed booth at the Utah Beer Festival on Saturday Aug. 15. I only was there for a little over two hours and man did it knock me out. I was beat! It was a lot of standing and engaging with people, which takes a lot more energy than people think! I then have agreed to be the driver for Urban Farm and Feed/Wasatch Front Farmers Market - picking up produce, eggs and random errands so that the other employees can focus on their jobs and become more productive. I did just over 4 hours the other day and handled it well. It was nice to have a purpose in my day, besides meeting up with people for lunch and such. But don't get me wrong, I do love that! I will start doing that more this week and then maybe in a few weeks start helping back at the farmers market. We shall see!

Driving and delivering!

This past weekend I got to spend it with some close friends. It was a lot of fun and everyone has commented on how much better I look and how they can tell I feel better because my energy is so different. I truly feel so much better and can feel things going back to normal a little more each day. Saturday was my good friend Ericas engagement party and I was stressing about what to wear... I'm not a dressup gal and they definitely are. I kept having what I call "Phantom Ponytail" issues. It is were I would find myself trying to decide how to do my hair for the party - curled, straight, up, down - the works. And then to realize that I don't have the hair to worry about doing those things to! It happened multiple times before the party. I haven't had to get dressed up since losing my hair, so it was the first time these ideas came to me. It was truly strange. The party was a lot of fun - can't wait for the bachelorette weekend in Seattle next month as well as the wedding and reception coming up. 

Engagement Party

Felt pretty that night

At a house party with some good friends - Courtney and I

Nova let me borrow her crown

Selfie

Treatment #5

I completed my 5th injection/3rd infusion Wednesday. It was a long day yet again, but that is to be expected. My large tumor has gone down another 1cm and the smaller tumor has gone down .5cm! Excellent news! Because the large one went down, we were able to inject both tumors with the drug. The small tumor is farther away from my scar so it has a lot more sensation, and let me just say it wasn't a pleasant feeling. Felt like a hot iron being held to my skin.. But it is over quick enough.
This day I was bombarded with positive comments from my doctor and all my nurses. They all commented on how well I've been handling everything and how strong I am being. I was told my positive energy is a breath of fresh air and welcomed in the clinic. It was really nice of them all to share with me, really gave me a second wind for the day.
I have been really tired the last few weeks - whether it is from doing more everyday or the treatment, but I think it is a combination of the two. I have felt so much better each day that it is hard to just sit around. Working up my stamina - gotta return to work someday!
The infusion went well too, saw a lot of young people in the infusion room. I posted a photo on Instagram and someone who was getting treatment found it and commented. She is 32, has stage 4 Melanoma and is going through the same treatment as I am. I saw her check in to the infusion room too! So I'm hoping to meet up with her, to have a buddy in this process. Pretty amazing what social media can do! I also got a message from an old high school buddy that works up at Huntsman and has been trying to catch me while doing treatment but without any luck. He said to keep up the good fight and that I'm inspiring people I don't even know are watching. I needed all these nice messages today - was starting to get a little burned out. But not anymore!

After treatment I was really sore and a bit nauseous. Boo! Was hoping to escape side effects fully, but it isn't too bad so it is manageable. Just lots of rest ahead and some mellow foods to eat.

Have three weeks off until my next treatment/infusion and then will be scanned to see if we continue with the injections (for up to 13 more). Here's hoping!!

In the infusion room @ Huntsman Cancer Institute

After the injections

Tumor from the front

Slightly smaller!

Messy new hair!

Staycation at Snowbird!

I spent the last week up at Snowbird Resort with some of my closest friends. It was a great get away, even if it is only 30 minutes away. Snowbird has a lot of fun activities to do and is just beautiful. We spent our days relaxing and hanging out - being lazy mostly. We went to the pool. Cooked some good food. Went to dinner. Went up the tram to the top of the mountain, 11,000 feet. Had some fun visitors. It is always fun to spend time with the Alston clan, happy they include me on their family fun! Here are some pictures from the week.

The car accident that saved my life

A year ago today I was leaving Vegas after a very fun weekend. We had gone to the Justin Timberlake concert (my favorite past time... #1 fan over here) and enjoyed some good girl time with my good friend Brooke. We hit the road to head home and when we were about half way home I dozed off (Brooke was driving). Shortly after that I was awaken by a large bang and then Brooke trying to stay in control of the car. We had been side swiped by the car next to us changing lanes. The speed limit at that point was 80mph. Both cars gained control and pulled off. I immediately was concerned for my back since I had had back surgery a short 5 months before. Nothing immediately hurt except my neck was a little tender. We were SO lucky we didn't lose control and flip or hit the median, it is amazing we didn't have more damage to us or the car. We exchanged information with the other driving and the car was alright to drive and we headed off. It took about 45 min of driving for me to fully lose it and freak out. I was so upset at the thought of a car accident so soon after my surgery and that something so quick could derail all the progress I had made in my rehabilitation. But I was so grateful for Brooke handling it so well and that we weren't hurt fully.  As the days went by I started to feel a bit of nerve pain down my arm so I decided to get it checked out. The doctor ordered an MRI of my neck to see if there was any disc damage - and there was. About a month later I had a steroid injection into one of my discs and I thought that was that. It was two months later that the neck doctor called me and said that they reopened my MRI and there was a very large lymph node that needed to be checked out. I called my general doctor and was seen the next day. Thankfully my doctor is very thorough and ordered a CT scan to confirm the findings - just to make sure it wasn't that I was sick the week of the MRI as that can make your lymph nodes swell as well. The CT scan confirmed it and that it was a bit larger. My doctor then ordered a needle biopsy to see what was happening. That biopsy was THE WORST thing. It was traumatic even. The lymph node was so hard/firm that it bent the numbing needle! The biopsy was hard for the doctor to do and required a ton of pressure so it was intense. And you need three samples, What was supposed to take 15min (I googled it before going in to know what to expect) ended up taking over an hour.  Definitely a rough day. After that I waited for the results and after two and a half long weeks it came back that it was in fact metastatic melanoma. My cancer had returned. That was January 14, 2015.
And so here we are. I say that the car accident saved my life because I wouldn't have had another scan for who knows how long. After you have 5 years of clear scans they stop scanning you and just do skin checks. My last scan before the accident was December 2013. It is only because I was hurt just enough to see a doctor that I was able to find the cancer before it spread past the lymph nodes in my neck. If not caught then it would have spread fast and most likely be terminal.
It is crazy how something that seemed so terrible at the time could be such a blessing in the end. Something I am truly thankful for. Whether it was my Gram pushing that car into us or some other force, who knows (that's about as spiritual as I will get... but something or someone was looking out for me that day)

Although it has been a crazy year it would have been even crazier if the car accident didn't happen. Everything does happen for a reason, as annoying as that sounds.

Baby Hairs

It has been over a week since my last treatment (injection/infusion) and I am feeling so good! I haven't had any side effects besides some fatigue but I don't really count that. I am hopeful that I will continue to not have any and things just keep going as good as they have been. It is really a great feeling to have energy to do things and not be sick. I feel like I am starting to have a handle on my life again, which is a great feeling after 8+ months of dealing with my cancer returning.

My hair has really started to grow - I didn't realize how much until I took a picture of it and compared it to one I took on 7/22. (2 1/2 weeks ago) Here are the pics..

7/22/15

8/7/15

It's amazing how much I lost but I am still thankful to have some of it left. My doctor said that I lost more than most people who go through biochemo. It's not a ton, but they are baby hairs and they are there!

Here is a picture of the tumor(s) and the size they are today. .

All in all things are going good and I couldn't be happier. I have two more weeks off before the next treatment and have some fun things planned.

xoxox