Pain, Pause and Progression.

As I have mentioned before, I have been in some intense pain in my joints. Mostly my hips and pelvis. A few days after my infusion I knew I was dehydrated so I went in to get some fluids. Because of the pain they did Xrays on my hips and pelvis to see if it showed anything. Sadly it did. The spot we knew about in my femur was more prominent and then there were all of these holes forming from the cancer deteriorating the bones in my pelvis. This gives a better understanding on the pain.
As soon as my xrays hit my doctors desk he decided I needed to move up my scans (10 days early) and then see me the following day. I knew that wasn't good. I ran into him and the nurses in the hall while waiting for my scans and I just knew that all this wasn't good and so I broke down. I am just frustrated and really wanted to stick to the Keytruda and have it work. Plus when I am in pain I am so much more vulnerable emotionally and break down much easier.
The appointment went better. These spots are throughout the bones and they are surprised I am able to tolerate as much pain as I have been. That said they prescribed a Fentanyl pain patch (isn't working great so far..) The good news from the appointment is that my lungs are stable and one of the brain tumors is gone and the other is smaller. Little wins. The Keytruda is paused and can be an option in the future. My cancer blood marker is in the 500's and growing (it should be 100ish) so it is just showing that there is some cancer growing or getting ready to grow at a rapid pace. We made the decision to go back on the BRaf inhibitors (debrafinib/mekinist) as we know that works fast at shrinking my tumors. This will hopefully help get my pain in control because I am not doing well with it.
I have been sleeping a lot because of the meds as well as it keeps my pain to a minimum the less I move. Working on staying hydrated and fed though because that's what led me to get dehydrated and needing fluids.
I wont lie, this information makes me upset and vulnerable. I just feel like it is close to being out of control and I'm not ready for that and it scares me. I am working hard on just working on things one day at a time, and it has been a challenge.

Hopefully these meds can reign in my cancer growth and its spreading. For now I am working on pain management.

Only one visible

It's hard to show but if you look at the bones you can see little bubble like spots, those are where the bone is being attacked